That friendly LinkedIn connection request may be the beginning of a sales pitch. Joe Muskus explains why the tactic can cost you far more relationships than it creates.
Last week I got a LinkedIn connection request from someone I didn’t know. Nice note. Said we were both in the Jacksonville business community, saw one of my posts and wanted to connect.
I accepted. We’ve all been victim to it.
Almost immediately:
“Thanks for connecting, Joe! Quick question. What are you currently doing for Top of Funnel these days?”
For the record, I delete the connection immediately because they connected under false pretenses. He never wanted my content. He wanted a prospect, and I’d just opened the door and sat him at my dining room table.
I’ve been in sales for about 30 years, and in my Fractional work I help companies figure out their go-to-market and how to grow—but more importantly, how to build a documented system for a repeatable growth engine. Over the years I’ve seen a lot of bad tactics. This one gets under my skin more than any of them.
If you’re trying to come across as a slimy salesperson, you’re nailing it.
You Asked for One Thing and Did Another
Call it what it is. You asked to connect, then used the connection to pitch. I never gave you permission to sell me anything. You took it. (Or rather, your AI tool did.)
Try that move at a networking event. Shake someone’s hand, tell them you’d love to get to know them, and before you let go ask what they’re doing about their cash flow problem. They’d walk off and tell three people about you on the way to the parking lot.
LinkedIn works the same way. It just happens faster and to more people.
And notice the assumption baked into that message. I have a problem, it’s the one you happen to solve, and I want to talk about it with a stranger who glanced at my profile for fifteen seconds. Nobody’s buying that.
“But It Works”
I hear this a lot.
It’s a numbers game. Send enough and somebody bites.
Sure, somebody will.
Just like someone bites on the three-card monty the first time they’ve seen it, and felt forced to stop and pay attention.
They both prey on people’s kindness.
But you’re paying for those few replies with everyone else. The people who rolled their eyes. The ones who quietly muted you and will scroll past everything you post from here on. The ones who would have referred you someday and now never will.
In a local market, that adds up fast, and people talk.
Know, Like, Trust
Be upfront about why you’re connecting. If you want to do business with me, fine. Say so.
Show up before you ask for anything. Comment on what people share, send them something useful, make an introduction. Let them get a sense of who you are.
Write about the pain points your clients actually deal with, not what your widget can do. When people see you know your stuff, they’ll come to you, and you won’t need the scripted follow-up.
Then be patient.
Some of my best relationships on LinkedIn took months to turn into anything. A few never turned into business directly but sent me referrals instead. That’s how trust works. It doesn’t run on a thirty-second timer.
Your network isn’t a lead list. It’s a group of people who will remember you as someone worth knowing, or as the guy who pitched them before the ink dried.
Before you hit send on the next “Thanks for connecting! Quick question…” message, think about which one you want to be.
Doing It the Right Way
None of this is to say LinkedIn outreach, or automation, is inherently bad. There are plenty of automated, AI BDR and managed services that do it well, and I use them myself and advise clients to use them when they’re appropriate.
The difference is in how they’re used.
There’s a big difference between blasting thousands of people with a disguised pitch and reaching a tightly defined audience that actually has the problem you solve—and being upfront about why you’re contacting them.
Yes, sales is still a numbers game. But I’d rather reach a smaller, better-qualified group and earn a higher meeting rate than burn through thousands of people to find the handful willing to respond.
If your business values its reputation, choose the tools and services representing you carefully.
At scale, a bad message doesn’t just create a bad interaction. It creates thousands of them.
And don’t get me wrong: it’s perfectly fine to connect with someone who could eventually become a customer or referral partner.
Just build the relationship before you tell them they have a monster on their back and you happen to sell the best monster trap in town.
Otherwise, by the time they figure out what just happened, they may be wondering whether you’re the one who let the monster out in the first place.
